Soon after climbing out of the lori (truck), a little hand reached out for mine. Quietly she motioned for her little friend to take my other hand. We walked hand in hand to the temporary structure in Nyamula for the Friday Bible study. I tried asking them simple questions, but they were too shy to respond.

On one side of the structure, a tarp was laid out for the ladies and children to sit on. Benches were placed on the other side for the men.

As we sat down on the tarp, the kids all crowded around me. They sat as close as they could, some with their arms in my lap as they leaned onto me. The ones sitting behind me leaned their heads on my shoulders as we sang. Whether they could read or not, they wanted to “read” my song book.

It is times like this that make everything worth it – the loneliness, the discouragement …it can feel like people only want to get close to us for money, and some days those things are difficult to take. If I am not careful, I could drown in self-pity on those days.

But the Lord always puts days like this in to help show me His love.

This is the first village where the kids weren’t terrified of us. It feels so nice to have them surround us, instead of running away in terror. I think this may be because there are a few children with albinism in that village, so our whiteness isn’t as shocking.

There are still people in that village who haven’t seen a white person before, but I think they’re usually visitors from the Mozambique mountains.

The other week, Abigail went to pass a tract to a teen girl. Abigail knew that she couldn’t catch up to her, so cut her off on the path ahead. The girl turned and fled screaming in terror. Brother Shadrick yelled out that Abigail only wanted to give her a paper. The girl stopped and took it, but was still wary of her.

Most of the time now, we find it amusing and laugh, but it still feels so nice when kids are not afraid of us!

But whether lonely or loved, HE IS WORTHY!

Through the good times or hard times, may I be found faithful!

We have started going to Nyamula on Fridays.  While Eric and Pastor Nelson are doing a salvation Bible study with the adults, Brother Shadrick and I have started taking the kids through the Bible. This past Friday we had gotten to the story of Cain and Abel.

We frequently mix in acting out the Bible stories.  This not only keeps their attention, but it also makes the Bible come more alive for them.

Sammy was acting out Cain and Daniel was Abel.  When they came to the part where Cain killed Abel, Sammy dramatically made it look like he hit Daniel from behind with a stone. 

Daniel does an excellent impression of fainting, and promptly dropped to the ground.  Brother Shadrick pointed at him and said, “See! He’s dead!”

Then Sammy put leaves on him to pretend like he was burying him. 

Suddenly, a few little ones started weeping loudly.  One immediately left for home crying.  

We had been so busy telling the story and watching the boys, that we hadn’t observed the distress of the littlest ones.  I quickly told Daniel to get up and reassured them that Daniel was okay. 

Most of the kids thought it was hilarious, but who knows what the stories will be in the village next week! 

We are only going to the church in Phokera on Sundays,which gives us a little more time Sunday morning.  It has been nice to move a little slower on Sunday morning. 

We have also started Wednesday prayer meetings in Phokera.  There are many ladies who cannot read.  It is not as much of a priority for them to go to school as it is for the boys.  It has been a burden on my heart that they would be able to read their Bibles.  The burden only grew as I looked for teachers for the children’s classes, but struggle not only to find ladies willing, but ones who are able to read. 

The Lord has opened the door for me to teach them to read Wednesdays before church.  I am not fluent in the language nor do I feel qualified for this job, but my prayer is that the Lord can work through me and do more than I thought possible.  Pray that the Lord allows them to learn to read and for Him to give me wisdom as I teach them.

Funerals are very important to the Malawian people.  Life almost seems to stop, and everything is dropped for them.  Unfortunately, there are many of them.  Sometimes it feels like death is a way of life here.

When people hear of a death, the youth and ladies choirs go to the home of the family and sings outside the home all night.  They continue the next morning until the service begins.  Children usually do not attend so they are left to themselves at home.  Because of this, I have only attended two funerals – Abambo Charlie was one of those.

Abambo (Mr.) Charlie was very faithful to church, even though it was difficult for him to get there.  He walked hunched over and always greeted us with a big smile.  Frequently his added comments during the preaching made it difficult to contain our laughter.  Because of sickness, he stopped coming.  I really wanted to go visit him, but never made the time to get over there.  How I regret that!  

When we arrived at the house, people were scattered around under different trees.  There is no set time for when it will start, but usually the funeral takes place as quickly as possible or the body will begin to stink – especially when it is the hot season.  They begin as soon as all the family and important people are there, and when the body is ready.  The church ladies help with the dressing of the women’s bodies, and the men help prepare the men’s bodies.  This is so foreign to me and I don’t know if I could handle that – though I know that the Lord could give me grace, if that is what I needed to do.

The guests of honor usually sit near the front center on chairs, while everyone else sits on the ground.  They were going to set a chair for me with my husband and the other preachers, but I requested to sit on the ground with the ladies.  You cannot avoid everyone’s stares, but being front and center makes me more uncomfortable and separated.

The church ladies laid out a tarp to sit on.  They dumped the buckets of flowers they had picked from bushes around the property and a flower that seems like it is a wildflower to me.  They began to gather bunches of stems from the wildflowers and shape them into wreaths.  Two ladies worked on shaping them into a cross.  When they had the wreaths and cross secure, they poked the flowers from the bushes into them.  It was beautiful!  How I wanted to take pictures of them working with the flowers, but it felt disrespectful to do that.

Sometimes I feel like my presence distracts from the occasion.  I felt like I had thousands of eyes on me.  The ladies around me were all talking about me.  Of course I didn’t understand everything being said, but I felt I could understand most of what was being said.  I still speak so poorly that they probably don’t know how much I understand.  It is funny to sit and listen sometimes, and at other times, it can feel stressful to have people talking about you all the time.  

When the funeral starts, the women are called up and sing a song, then place the flowers on the casket.  They all sit around the casket during the preaching and speaking.  Throughout the service, women will begin crying out, some even appear to pass out and have to be carried away.

At the gravesite, I sat with a lady from church.  She told me that we should move to the shade, and I did.  Some of the village men behind us began to talk and say, “She doesn’t know Chichewa!” “No way!”  I was just going to pretend like I didn’t hear them, but the lady I sat with turned around and told them that I knew Chichewa and Sena (the village language here).  I told them a little.  I only know a few phrases in Sena, so it would be a stretch to say that I know that.  But it does have many Chichewa words mixed in so I can sometimes understand still.

So many things seem to make Bible times come alive.  The funerals remind me of when Jesus healed the little girl and had to make all the people around her leave before he healed her.  Part of me feels like this open grieving and focusing on it helps people move on. But sometimes the emphasis on death and funerals makes me think of the verses when Jesus said in Matthew 8:22, “Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.”  People here feel the need to go to every single funeral in the village, but if we do that, we would only be going to funerals and everything else would be canceled.  There definitely has to be a balance.  We are not here to change their culture, but I do pray that we can impress on them to follow Christ above all else.

“What if I said let’s have a contest to see who can jump over the Shiree River,” I said to the group. They all started laughing and saying no…except one man. He said, “Okay!”

Shocked, Brother Shadrick questioned him, “You’d try to jump across the River?”

“Yes, in faith!” he replied.

I told him that we wouldn’t be trying that. Because while they might make it a little further than I would, the river is very wide and we’d all just end up being crocodile food.

This man was the first to ever except my offer because everyone knows it is impossible.

Just as we can’t make it across the Shiree, we cannot get to heaven on our own as all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.

While this man talked a lot while I was witnessing, another man sat quietly, intently listening. As we were finishing talking with them, he pleaded with me to please tell him what he needed to do to be saved and he prayed to ask Christ as his Savior.

The weather has been beautiful lately, it’s been mostly low 80°s, but mornings can be cool. We’ve had a few days in the 70°s. You can feel the tension release from your body in the cooler season. We are enjoying these beautiful, cooler days.

One of my favorite things here is the constant singing of the birds. I’ve always loved the sound of birds! Here there are so many, and they are singing all day. It’s such a relaxing sound!

I have been struggling lately with body pains, but the Lord continues to give me the strength for each day. I have a little less teaching to do as I’ve stepped away from teaching here at this church as we transition it to national leadership. The teachers have grown so much and are leading it extremely well. I have started looking for ladies in Phokera who we can start training as well.

One of my greatest struggles is not feeling guilt over having something. My husband recently had a dress made for my birthday, and I tried convincing him not to as I feel like I have so much! This will be the first new outfit I’ve had in almost year and a half, besides a like new secondhand dress we found at the beginning of the year. This is completely my doing as my husband would love to be able to get me something, but the guilt overwhelms me! They have maybe one or two outfits, yet I already have so so much!

I feel guilty having a bed to sleep on or a chair, when many of them are sleeping on dirt floors – some without mats or blankets! How do you overcome this guilt? I haven’t figured it out yet. We try to do what we can, but the needs are endless.

Pray that the Lord gives your missionaries the wisdom of how to have a proper balance in this area and in the area of our time. Balance is such a difficult thing to have and keep!

“I’ve never sinned.” “I’m not praying to God! He took my kids away!” This is what an elderly lady named Fatima has said…and yet she desperately wanted to be baptized!

She cried when others were baptized because, even though she didn’t want to talk to God, she wanted to be baptized.

She has been heavy on our hearts and we have been praying for her. She had malaria pretty severely a few weeks ago and we thought she might die without turning to Christ.

Finally, Saturday she told Eric that she had trusted in Christ after last week’s service! She said that she had lied, and that she was a sinner. She said that not only was she drinking beer, but she had brewed it at some point in her life.

I had planned on sharing her story with you all and asking you to pray for her, but now I also get to share the good news at the same time!

It truly is such a blessing to be able to be a part of this ministry!

The weather has been much cooler lately, which we are greatly enjoying. It’s not cold, but we want sweaters in the mornings.

One of my favorite things to do is sit on the front porch and look at the pink flowering bush against the brick wall. Beyond that, you can just see the mountains. I definitely wish I had a better view from my porch of those mountains!

Maybe soon I can start “blogging” again, but lately the words are just not coming together.

Pictures are of soulwinning on Saturday and after church with some of the kids.

As we step from the van in Phokera, we are immediately greeted by a few of our kids there. All smiling and ready to carry things for us.

I looked up to see Sammy running from the truck towards us, holding his tie up in the air. Following closely behind were three, little, mischievous boys, all trying to grab his tie.

Their joyful interaction made me think about how blessed we are to get to be a part of this ministry that the Lord has called us to.

The kids are finishing up their school year, and getting excited for a break. I am too. It feels like we’ve been schooling straight without breaks for a few years now, and we all need one.

The Bible college has also finished! It is so crazy to think about. We have gotten so used to having these pastors around that I know we will all miss them.

There have been some exhausting days, but the Lord has been blessing me in little ways. Sometimes those little things mean so much!

Eric had these nightstands built for me for my birthday last year. I didn’t have enough handles for the drawers, so Eric planned on picking more up when he went to town. Eric checked every time he went to the city for them. After almost a year, I had given up hope of them ever getting them again. But look what he brought back the other week! I was so excited when I opened the bag and saw them!

The other week I was looking through pictures of flowers and thought how much I wished I could get hydrangeas and geraniums here. Guess what Eric brought back right before Mother’s Day? Wow! These little blessings mean so much. How much God cares for us and sometimes gives us these sweet little things to show us! I’m not sure if they’ll make it once the hot season hits, but I’m sure going to try!

In Phokera, it has been encouraging to see a few of our faithful kids come forward for salvation. One young lady I have been praying for came forward a few weeks ago. She has always been a sweetheart, but I can already see a change in her. She has a desire to help with the children’s ministry there.

Abigail has a little friend in Phokera who greets us with the biggest smile each week…though for some reason, they all think they can’t smile for pictures.

She is mute, but so sweet! Even though she can’t talk, we think she can hear. This last week she brought Abigail a gift – locusts! Abigail has come SO far! Last year she was screaming about the locusts, this year holding them. She has despised bugs since she was little! She wouldn’t eat at a picnic table once because she saw an ant. But now she’s holding bugs better than me!

The weather has been much cooler, which has been nice. Tonight the low is supposed to be 60°. It was about 100° on Friday, so a huge drop. I was actually freezing on Sunday morning and thinking we might actually want some soup this year! Yay! I love and miss soup.

I want to say thank you so much for your prayers for us. I don’t feel like I can always share everything, but I can feel your prayers. There have been moments when there has been so much going on, when I’ve felt pressed on every side and this verse comes to mind …”We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;” 2 Corinthians 4:8

Though I cannot say I have gone through half of what Paul had gone through, or even what some of you have gone through. I don’t feel overwhelmed or in despair even with everything going on around me, or even with being pressed above measure in every direction. I know that it is partly due to your prayers that we can have the peace of God during these times. Thank you!

There is so much to write about, but I can’t seem to organize my thoughts enough to put them into words. Every time I begin to write, someone starts talking to me.

Talking hasn’t been much easier lately either. (I say this somewhat jokingly). The other week I told one of the guards that the weather was beautiful…well, at least that’s what I was trying to say. Instead I ended up saying the tree is beautiful because the words are very similar. That poor guard! I tend to make all my mistakes with that one! He most likely thinks I’m nuts!

The other week I was determined to write, but my adorable little friend (a regular visitor), hid behind the wicker chair and began calling out in Chichewa, “Amayi! Where’s Pulo? Where’s Pulo?” Finding little Promise was definitely more important!

So after at least a month of different little things like that, I hardly know where to begin or how to get everyone caught up.

I feel like I’ve had very little quiet time lately for writing, but actually I still have some – it’s just being used to write lesson plans for the Sunday School teachers we’re working with. We are so blessed in America! If you need Sunday School material, we have many to choose from. But here, there is nothing that I know of. So I am working my way through the Bible, preparing lessons…and keeping Brother Shadrick busy with translation work. I am so grateful for his help as it’s a very large project.

Another burden I have is to give the children a desire to read God’s Word for themselves. Bibles may be hard to get, but we usually have plenty of John and Romans. We are working to put together reading plan sheets with questions for kids. Whoever is interested will get a John and Romans with weekly questions to fill in.

These two projects have been taking up most of my “free time” (is there such a thing as a homeschooling mom?).

We held baptisms in Phokera a couple weeks ago and now they are officially a church! Everyone was very excited…and it felt like everyone wanted pictures with me that day. I was quite exhausted by that time, but how could I say no?

When we arrived home, one of the ladies knelt down to hand something to Brother Shadrick. A little while later, Lydia knelt down to hand him something. Everyone laughed and he called her a real Malawian. How different that is then American culture! Could you imagine the uproar if a man in America expected women to greet him or hand him stuff only when kneeling?

The other difference is that the girls here carry everything – not the boys. The other week someone set some bags down and motioned for the girls to get them while saying, “Here you go, strong girls!” My girls were just shocked! Thankfully, they were rescued by their strong brothers, who quickly grabbed them.

Easter Sunday, through your gifts, we were able to provide meals for both the church here in Tengani and the church in Phokera. We were not able to attend either meal as we were preparing for the second services, but have heard that it was a blessing to many.

Tomorrow the church in Phokera will be holding “regular” services, meeting in the morning instead of in the afternoon like before. It will be a mad rush!

Services here are from 7-9:30 AM, and services in Phokera begin at 10. We will have very little time between the two churches. I am trying to make sure that I don’t forget anything! Just when I thought I had everything, I remembered that I hadn’t packed pictures for my S.S. teachers here or in Phokera, nor my lesson.

Surprisingly, amidst all the craziness, the Lord gives strength and peace. Oh, there are moments when I crave quietness, but what mom doesn’t?

God is good! And I am thankful that He has called us to this ministry. It is really nothing about us. I think the Lord called us to a slower growing mission field previously just so that we wouldn’t get prideful. Everything here is only because the Lord is doing a work, and we get to play a small part in it.

If you remember, pray for us tomorrow for strength and clarity of mind!

We are still here, and all is well! There are many struggling with malaria right now, but God has protected us so far.

The church here in our village is being reorganized and we are slowly working toward turning it over to national leadership.

I haven’t been teaching at this children’s ministry as I’ve been trying to get others involved as much as possible. It is a little sad because I love teaching so much, but it has been a blessing to see a younger generation stepping up to serve the Lord. It’s encouraging also to see how they are growing as teachers.

This past Sunday held special blessings, which I know are answers to your prayers as well. I had shared a few months ago of a young girl who had been practicing witchcraft, but had made a profession of faith. This Sunday she came forward during prayer request time, asking us to pray for her as she struggled with an angry spirit. When we questioned her, she said she hasn’t practiced witchcraft since she had trusted Christ! Not only is the Lord working in her life to make her give up witchcraft, but He is also giving her a desire to work on other areas. It is so encouraging to see her growing!

During prayer time, we also had a girl about 12 years old say she needed to be saved. She has been very faithful to services. To see her come forward was a special blessing.

The church plant in Phokera is always a highlight of my week. Not only am I able to teach the children, but I especially look forward to “visiting” with the ladies there. There is a special sweetness about them.

Often people will look at pictures and comment how much people must love us, but usually it feels more like a love that the Jews had for Jesus – He was interesting to them, and many people were just there for what He could do for them. I am reminded of that often as that is how I feel.

If I came here to be loved, I would have left a long time ago. The mission field can be very lonely. I came because I love HIM. But I do greatly enjoy these ladies and look forward each week to our weekly limited conversations. I can’t wait for the day when we can fully fellowship one with another!

Please don’t feel bad for me, though! Between homeschooling, family, and ministry, there’s not much time to feel lonely.

I have been able to help in the medical ministry almost daily this week, which I love doing. It is kind of funny to me though since I always felt faint at the sight of blood before. I feel like the Lord has given me extra grace and strength in this area, so much so that it doesn’t bother me anymore, because it opens doors to share the Gospel. I also enjoy being able to help people, it gives me an opportunity to practice my Chichewa, and forces me away from my routine… otherwise I’d probably never leave the house because I have so much to do. So it is a welcome interruption.

I haven’t had a translator to help me there for some time now, and while I’ve been able to pass out tracts and John and Romans to each person, it has bothered me to not be able to witness. I decided that I would prepare my Chichewa Bible and try. I can say a little and I can read verses.

About a week ago, late one night, I began looking up different phrases that I wanted to say, and marking my Bible. But I never felt fully ready to try it.

There was one lady in particular who I wanted to witness to, and I knew that my time with her was running out as her daughter’s wound is almost healed.

Wednesday I decided that I just needed to do it. I began praying for the Lord to give me opportunities. When I was called for a patient, I considered waiting as it wasn’t the lady I was thinking about talking with.

I fought with the decision the entire time I was bandaging her daughter’s foot. After I finished, I told her I would like to talk with her for a little while. I’m sure she was wondering how we were going to talk with my limited Chichewa!

I pulled out my New Testament and talked a little, but I got so nervous that I forgot almost everything I planned to say and just read verse after verse.

I walked back to the house feeling so defeated! I had failed and didn’t say enough. I felt like I must have looked silly just speed reading through those verses!

God immediately showed me my pride and brought this verse to my mind,

“For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12

It was as if He said to me, “MY Word is powerful – not yours. I don’t need your words for someone to get saved. Mine are all that are needed.”

I asked Him to forgive me. It’s funny how we put so much importance on our words and presentation, when it has nothing to do with us!

I still wanted to be ready so yesterday, instead of counting on my poor memory, I wrote down a few extra things I wanted to share, and asked Him to give me the Words HE wanted me to say, as I feel like Moses – I am slow of speech, but I know God made my tongue. The Lord gave me the opportunity to share the Gospel twice today. I almost chose not to out of nervousness, but both times I decided to follow the Lord’s leading. The first was with the lady I had originally wanted to, the second was with a man. I’m sure he especially could tell I was nervous as my hand was shaking so much.

Again, I feel like I cannot offer much, but God promises that His Word will not return void…it’s not about me! How thankful I am that it’s not about me!

As I walked back, I thought about how often I took for granted the wonderful opportunity to witness in my own language, and how sometimes I didn’t witness as I should when I could so easily do it.

I’ll close with these sweet pictures of some of my favorite people. Last week we were able to take kids to Blantyre, just for a fun day out. They weren’t sure it would be worth the long drive, but changed their minds when they found some traditional dresses and shirts. Abigail was the only one unable to find a dress (she found something else she liked though). They were so excited! I sure do love these guys!